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Old 12-27-2009, 12:57 AM   #1
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Default Need to help my cousin from ex

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Ok so here's the story.

My cousin recently had her three baby girls taken away from her, due to her jackass exboyfriend abusing them. Now that she is waiting for the trial to get them back the ex is somehow calling her and makes it show up as a different number other than his. More specifically numbers in her phone, like a friend, home, and the local sheriff office. Not only is that going on, but the messages on her Blackberry Messenger are being deleted little by little. What I mean is like only a few messages from the conversation, but not the entire conversation. The other night he called her and made it show up as a friend of hers and she was sitting right in front of that friend.


So, this is my question. How is he doing that and how can I stop it?
I know one way I can stop it, but it's not exactly legal. If you catch my drift.
Any help would truly be appreciated. She has the 8130 Pearl with Cellular South.
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Old 12-27-2009, 01:19 AM   #2
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Wirelessly posted (Scared of sea bunnies)

This is definitely a matter for the police or local authorities.

Sorry to hear about the problems but that's probably the only step you should take right now.

As for the caller I.D. "spoofing" -- don't know enough to explain how it can be done.
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Old 12-27-2009, 01:32 AM   #3
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She went to have papers made out on him at the police station and they told her to go to the sheriff station that the number was used for (when he called using it to show up) and said they couldn't do anything about it. She also called Cellular South and they did the ##000000 thing and they proved that the computers had been hacked or something, but didn't know what to do to stop it (in others words they were too lazy at the moment).

And on the I.D. situation, I'm on the same boat as you. I know a crap load of stuff on electronics period, but this is something I don't know about. I know how it's done on older phones, but none from the past couple of years.
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Old 12-27-2009, 02:54 AM   #4
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Ok, well I think I may have figured it out. I believe he may have used the spoofapp. I just found the website and downloaded it to my blackberry and tried it out. I set it to call my phone and to show up as my exgf's number and I got the call and it showed her contact information. I'm fairly sure it's what he used because he has a blackberry too.
As far as the messages being deleted, not sure on if RIM has a auto delete on the new BBM if the message history save feature isn't enabled.
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Old 12-27-2009, 03:16 AM   #5
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If the "free files" aka memory starts running low it will start deleting the oldest messages and such so new ones have room to arrive.
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Old 12-27-2009, 03:27 AM   #6
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That might be it. I know her phone has been freezing up a lot and I know that's one sign of the phone's memory being close to full. That's one reason why I have a 4gb memory card that I save everything on and once a week clear my event log out with the alt+lglg thing. Hardly ever freezes.
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Old 12-27-2009, 08:54 AM   #7
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Ok the first ...are they on the same plan together? If so and she's the owner she needs to drop him and if its the other way around she needs to drop hers. I know people these days think they can't live without there cell phone and all but this is for the best. I'm a police officer and I have actually personally experienced a stalking situation with an ex bf stalking my fiancé. It CAN get worse really fast. TRUST ME!!!!

If she is on her own plan without him she needs to change her number and only give it out to VERY close family/friends.

In regards to the caller I'd spoofing....there are MANY apps out there that do this. She needs to go to her local law enforcement agency where she lives and DEMAND a case started. This phone/identity/stalking stuff can get complicated with the jurisdiction limitations BUT the supreme court has upheld charges that originated outside jurisdictions in regards to these kinda cases.

Remember she DEMANDS a report to be started. She may have to go over a patrol officers head all the way up the chain of command. Trust me, I've been through it myself even being an officer myself.
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Old 12-27-2009, 10:32 AM   #8
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The whole solution to this problem is to make a report to law enforcement.
Even if someone is using a spoof app, correct call data can be recovered with a search warrant or subpoena.
These issues are criminal and nature and should be reported and prosecuted.
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Old 12-27-2009, 11:08 AM   #9
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Exactly jbair ...but it does get very complicated when talking jurisdiction limits and such. A lot of departments try there best to avoid starting a report/case on something where there is a jurisdiction question. Its hard to prosecute something that did not happen in your jurisdiction. Its also really hard to transfer cases from one department to another. Departments really try to avoid it. That's why she has to DEMAND it and not let up.

And yes information can be gotten through search warrants and subpoenas to figure out whom is doing the calling and where the calls originated so as to establish the venue of where the crime took place. But that's just it...what department is going to stick there neck out there to apply for warrants and or subpoenas when they aren't sure the crime took place within their jurisdiction.

And that's my whole point about all this being pretty complicated. Trust me...I know. I've lived it. What's even worse is when the person doing the stalking and or harassing just happens to be former law enforcement and knows the same information and uses it to his advantage.
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Old 12-27-2009, 11:45 AM   #10
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Any agency should initiate the complaint and start to work it.
Being in the business, our agency never turns anyone away. We would work the case to determine venue or jurisdiction, and then make every attempt to have the agency with jurisdiction take the case.
I know that not every agency will take these types of events seriously, but I think the majority will. And, if the agency balks at taking the case, the squeaky wheel gets the grease. Keep complaining up the chain of command until the right administrator hears it. He/she will make sure the case gets worked correctly.
And, if the suspect is an officer, the complaint becomes that much more important. Believe it or not, the vast majority of officers don't want "bad apples" in their ranks. It reflects badly on all of us.
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Old 12-27-2009, 12:22 PM   #11
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jbair, your right. The department I work for does not turn anyone away either. But not all operate like this. And actually most smaller departments do not. As I very well found out quickly. I work a decent size department and as much as our investigators hate it, we start the reports regardless if they live within our jurisdiction.

And just so you know in my particular case he was not an officer at the time he was doing the stalking. He had been fired a few years back when a case came about of him impersonating an officer while he was a just a jailer. He also had been suspected of prowling and peeping at an apartment complex while he was actually working. This guy was seriously ate up and disturbed. I actually used a trail/deer camera to catch him on my property. He was also buying a new prepaid cell phone every week and using it along with that bluetooth spying software to screw around with us. When he was FINNALY arrested a search warrant was issued for his residence. Among lots of interesting things found like drugs, child pornography, tons of surveillance equipment with evidence that he had A LOT of extracurricular activities, a driver's license was found with all MY info on it but with a picture of him as well as fake police Id's and badges with his info on it.

So yea.... I could probably write a book about this. He did a lot of crazy stuff.
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Old 12-27-2009, 02:39 PM   #12
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twinglock40z, to the plan question, I'm pretty sure they have separate plans, but wouldn't stake my life on it. The only reason she hasn't and won't have her number changed, is the case worker with DHS has her cell, the people that are taking care of her girls with DHS has it, the doctors she uses, her lawyer, and all that stuff has it. If it was any regular time without the child situation going on, she would have already changed it.

And I'll tell her what the two of you said about demanding the case be started.

oh and twing, how much time did that guy get? I know child porn and impersonating a cop are serious offenses. And not just impersonating a cop, but wouldn't that be identity theft too, seeing as he had an ID with all your info on it.
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Old 12-27-2009, 02:56 PM   #13
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Yes he is has been charged with multiple offenses. He's allegedly committed several types of identify thefts. Not just from me but from several people. A lot of interesting things were found in his home. A lot I won't ever disclose.

here is just a few of the charges he has although he has not been convicted yet.

Aggravated stalking. Stalking x 2(come to find out we weren't the only ones. And after this several other women came out but only 2 others so far have enough for actual charges). Impersonating an officer x 3. Distribution and possession of child pornography. Possession of controlled substance x 6. Possession of firearm by convicted felon(didn't even know that he was a felon till he was arrested again).
Credit card fraud...don't know how many counts. Several different typed of identity theft charges. Making false police reports. Harassing communications. Criminal trespass. ...just to name a few

His court date right now keeps getting pushed back. Its starting to tick me off.

I'm telling you I could seriously write a best seller book about this crap. It was insane.
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Old 12-27-2009, 03:18 PM   #14
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Dang, I'd hate to be him, but he'll get what he deserves one day. I swear some people are getting more stupid every day. I've only made one mistake that was serious, but I'm paying for it through community service and restitution.

But seeing as you said you are a cop, can I ask you a question? I'd ask my Criminal Justice instructor, but we're out for the holidays. On domestic abuse, is it only if the two are married or can it be just dating and living together? The reason I ask is, a few months ago, this same cousin and the ex were living together. One night he grabbed her around the throat and pinned her to a wall and threatened her with a knife. The sheriff came, picked him up, and took him to the station. Wouldn't he automatically be charged with it by the arresting officer? And after being charged with it, shouldn't he lose his right to own a gun?
Have another question, depending on the answers.
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Old 12-27-2009, 03:28 PM   #15
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Well it really depends on what the state defines as domestic abuse. In most states its as follows...if you live together, married, divorced, have children together or are directly related. That being said you need to look up how your state defines it.

And upon conviction yes you lose your right to own a firearm. And some states actually seize the weapons upon a judge's order after a charge is made. But this isn't always the case. Depends on state, county, and judge.
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Old 12-27-2009, 03:52 PM   #16
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Ok, the three girls I mentioned in my original post are his. But the reason I asked was, he did get charged with it and convicted. A month or two after that happened, he done something similar. As we were all leaving from helping her pack, he pulled a gun out and pointed it at her in the car as she was backing out. And when the officers finally got there (almost two hours after the first call, about 5 miles from the police station), they didn't take him in or anything. And I know they knew about the previous charges, because they questioned me about what happened and asked about what happened last time.
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Old 12-27-2009, 03:57 PM   #17
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Did they find him in possession of the firearm?
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Old 12-27-2009, 04:57 PM   #18
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Sounds like she needs to get a lawyer to handle this.

I don't think we are going to solve this here anytime soon.
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Old 12-27-2009, 05:00 PM   #19
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Well, they went inside the house to talk to him. The gun cabinet is in the living room with four rifles in it. And that's where they talked to him.
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Old 12-27-2009, 05:26 PM   #20
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Then you need to call the local probation office (state or federal or whatever previous jurisdiction he was convicted under) and speak to an officer about his parole/probation violation.

Some charges (like possession of a firearm by a felon) have to be observed by an officer, or have a complaint filed with a local magistrate. It varies, and it honestly varies with what the officer on the scene chooses to deal with at the time.

Anyway, has your cousin had the complaint with the local SO filed yet? Why is she waiting, they are open 24/7...
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